took my heart and shook my psyche,
so ingrained i’m having nightmares
about people i don’t know
about car wrecks i think i can control
"
I.
Can death be sleep, when life is but a dream,
And scenes of bliss pass as a phantom by?
The transient pleasures as a vision seem,
And yet we think the greatest pain’s to die.
II.
How strange it is that man on earth should roam,
And lead a life of woe, but not forsake
His rugged path; nor dare he view alone
His future doom which is but to awake.
- On Death John Keats (via lesgardenias)
(Source: choimin-ho, via j-m-emmons)
This room has so many windows, too many windows.
I’ve sat and watched the trees framed to fade outside.I hope the seasons treat you well.
I hope the seasons treat you kind.
As kind as I never was, as comforting as I never could be.I saw two fake long stemmed roses on the windshield of a car.
September come please take this heart away.All of these windows bring in the cold air.
I hope you have a coat to keep you warm.Warmer than those last times we spoke, warmer than the last words we said.
I’m sure the wind blows gently on you now.
I hope that nothing will ever remind you of me.Glue that faded photo on a worn out journal page.
It reads: “September come please take this heart away”.
What’s the furthest place from here?
It hasn’t been my day for a couple years.
What’s a couple more?
And if I go, don’t forget the one good thing I almost did.
I learned your name without words.
I used my eyes, not my hands.
What’s the closest you can come to an almost total wreck and still walk away,
All limbs intact?
And when I go, you’ll be there crying out, begging me.
I won’t hear.
I’ll just go fast into this night on broken legs.
A near miss or a close call?
I keep a room at the hospital.
I scratch my accidents into the wall.
I couldn’t wait to breathe your breath.
I cut in line,
I bled to death.
I got to you, there was nothing left.
What’s the meanest you can be to the one you claim to love
And still smile to your new found friends?
In the same confusing breath,
You pull away and draw me in.
I wanted you. You wanted more.
I built this life and now it’s mine.
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straight, white male takes gender studies class in hopes to find cute feminists to pursue